Gambling – Replace one addiction for another?
Hi my friends, battlers and survivors!
I hope Monday finds you well.
Ok, so I wanted to talk about addiction, and my personal battle with Gambling! So when I stopped drinking and taking cocaine I found myself having a ‘flutter’ here and there. This steadily became as a massive problem for me. Somewhere along my journey to recovery I got hooked. Whether it be horses, slot machines or roulette I just hammered it! It could have been up to £500 a session and this is money I really didn’t have!!!
I come from a family of responsible gamblers and I suppose my extreme nature just sent me into a loop!
I don’t think I can blame my BPD for the gambling I think it’s a choice that I make and I feel quite weak around the betting. I do believe I have tried to swap one addiction for another so I have to take action. I think extreme gambling can lead to big losses…..not just financially but at home and relationships also.
How am I going to move forward –
So I have recently self excluded from ALL Gambling outlets online. By self excluding I am physically unable to bet now. I can no longer place a bit. I thank the gambling commission for this functionality.
How am I going to maintain my emotions –
So I feel very anxious around this subject, I feel like I’ve done a bad thing by self excluding (crazy huh!) And I feel like I have caused myself some sort of loss. The crazy thing is the more money I’ve earnt the more problems I’ve had financially!???
I have created a budget tracker in my phone and I plan to track pretty much every penny from the month of April. I want to see my money in the bank not in the arse pants of some bookie!.
How will I hope when I do face an opportunity to gamble –
So I have to plan for this occasion! I know in May there is a get together at our local race course, I need to have a stratergy for this! I’ll work it out and update this thread.
I hope anyone who is having a similar issue can get some help and take some pro-active steps to help your issues.